Audience essay feedback and learner response

 1) Copy and paste your feedback from the email in full - WWW, EBI and LR.

Audience essay feedback:

WWW:

·        You’ve written an 800+ word essay and covered a range of very good points that relate to the question – well done! This is a huge achievement and demonstrates your ability in this subject.

·        You’ve picked out some key points from the lessons we did on this topic such as the changes to how audiences can access media products due to the internet. I particularly like the section on citizen journalism and livestreaming which really supports the point you are making. Examples and statistics are important and make your argument much more convincing – more of this please!

·        This is a great start in developing our writing for extended essay responses – both Media exams have 20-mark essays in them.

EBI:

·        You need to work on written English in places – spelling, punctuation and grammar. At GCSE level, good written English is essential. Basics like there/their/they’re and loose/lose are important to get right.

·        Aside from this, the key element to develop is examples and statistics to support your points. You do this in places but more specific examples and statistics will add weight to your argument and make your essays even more convincing.

LR:

Complete the LR tasks on the GCSE Media Year 1 blog – Audience and Industry essay feedback LR.

2) What was the word count for your essay?

The word count for my essay is 832.

3) What was your strongest paragraph? Why do you think it was better than others?

My strongest paragraph was the third one which contains disadvantages of the music industry. i believe this is better than the others because it contains strong key points which were backed up by evidence to support it.

4) What was your weakest paragraph? Why do you think it wasn't as good as others?

My weakest paragraph was my 6th paragraph on the advantages of the newspaper industry. I believe this because i had run out of ideas to help me write about the paragraph making it a lower standard..

5) How can you improve your extended writing in GCSE Media Studies in future?

I can improve my extended writing in GCSE Media in the future by working on my written English and i need examples as well as statistics that will add weight to my arguments.

6) Write ONE thing you have learned about the internet, audience and industry from completing this essay.

One thing that i have learned about the internet from audience and industry is that the media has evolved as it has been impacted by the audiences views and their opinions changing it in every way.